Picture your favorite holiday. You invest in hundreds of decorations and count down the days until said holiday arrives. Now, imagine everything you’ve ever known and loved about it is taken from you. 

The Fourth of July isn’t actually a worldwide celebration. Saint Patrick’s Day turns out to be more than just drinking beer. Presidents Day is about more than just car sales. This, sadly, was the reality for me. 

Groundhog Day, a day of celebration for the arrival of spring or the mourning for the long winter ahead, has always kept me on my toes. But this year I found out that my beloved Groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, has been spreading lies. 

The staple of Groundhog Day is Phil’s shadow. We all wait in anticipation wondering if his shadow will show or be hidden from the world. However, the famous prognosticating rodent was not even given a chance to use his fortelling shadow on this year’s Groundhog Day. 

Placed on the top of Phil’s man-made tree stump sat two scrolls: one for early spring and one for the long, grueling months of winter. Old white men with beards that may or may not be real, Abraham Lincoln style top hats, and black suits they pulled out of their dead grandmother’s closet gathered around Phil not to see his shadow, but to see which scroll he chose. That’s right. Phil, if that’s even his name, just has to sniff a scroll and the decision of the new season is made.

I am deeply horrified by this perjurous crime. If I can’t trust a fun-loving holiday like Groundhog Day, then how can I trust the others? Is the Easter Bunny even real? Are the hoove-steps of Santa’s reindeer on my roof just a figment of my imagination? Does the Tooth Fairy really take my teeth and use them to build a tooth castle?

My favorite movie, Groundhog Day, a one hour and 41 minute comedy and romance film starring British Academy Award winner Bill Murray, is no longer the same for me. Each time Punxsutawney Phil makes an on-screen appearance, I cry at how innocent I was the first time I watched Phil show his “shadow.” 

To see if my peers were as knowledgeable in Groundhog Day lore, I asked this age old question: “Did you know that Groundhog Day doesn’t actually have anything to do with Punxsutawney Phil’s shadow?” 

After averaging my data, I found the overall consensus was that this was a new astounding fact. Alex was so shaken up she entered a mid life crisis at age sixteen. Nitzan replied with a simple, yet powerful, “No.” Finally, Sophie questioned the meaning of Groundhog Day, asking if it was now about “some weird old guys in a cult.”

Groundhog Day was once a time of celebration and uncovering mysteries. But,  now, it’s in tatters. Has Punxsutawney Phil ever even shown his shadow in his life? Is he even alive? 

These are the kinds of questions the Groundhog Club’s Inner Circle must answer. To be the change, contact admin@groundhog.org and make them come forward with their lies.