“I stink at communicating in general. Can you help me?”

In this day and age, people say that the internet is pretty much taking over the modern world. A lot of people say “Oh my God! People are turning into robots! There’s no communication between people! These cell phones are like face eaters! AAAAAAAAAA!”

Those are problems with technology coming in – as with any age for humans to use tools. There are two main ways to communicate: The internet, and face-to-face. This article will help you on how to talk with and without our robot overlords (phones).

With Your Phone:

1. Video Chat

It’s really not that hard to do: you open your iphone, go to extras, head to facetime and click the thing to talk to the person you wanna talk to. It’s like what: 3 taps and you’re talking about all sorts of topics. Or if you don’t use an iPhone, use whatever app you have on your device to talk to people. An great example for a computer is Skype. Voice/face chat is the best way to have a human connection when communicating digitally than it is by texting. Text is just that – text; you can send an emoji to express emotion but that is futile to express the actual organic complex emotions a person feels than only lines of cold calculated code.

2. Memes:

Doesn’t everyone love a good laugh? Whether the meme be a laugh at someone’s misfortune, offensive material, or something just flat out dumb, memes are what make the world memeingful (pun intended). This is something more to do as a face-to-face thing than texting it to your friends but nobody is stopping you from sending memes to your friends on a Snapchat group chat – except maybe your local high school that hates fun things.

Be aware however that memes can be offensive in many different ways. That does not mean memes are intentionally trying to spread hate; it is, for half of the time, how people react to them that matters. People get upset with it or they just brush it off and say “whatever, I’m not gonna let this bother me because it’s a dumb joke.” Offensive memes spread edgy and dark comedy in an attempt to provoke people. But hasn’t comedy itself done that long before internet memes? But of course, be careful of what you say sometimes. However, memes do not have to always be offensive or vulgar to be funny.

Be cautious however not to be too immersed in just sharing memes all the time with people because then you won’t really develop a good friendship or if you’re trying to make friends you won’t build up any character. If anything, people would see you as a living Vine Compilation – only interested for a cheap laugh but forgotten for not building up your own personality.

3. Interests:

If the internet has done anything, it brought millions of people together to enjoy similar interests they have. You could show your friends a music list from obscure musical artists they never heard of or contribute to a website that might perk both of your interests.

With that being said, a lot of people have online friends, people that they met only through the internet. Sure it may sound like a cure for lonely people, but it could only be used as a temporary solution for socially anxious people. These friendships aren’t true either the two parties are too shy to show their faces or they live too far apart. Only on incredibly rare occasions have online friends met in real life with love relationships being even rarer, like how I would want my hamburger done.

4. Multiplayer (at home and online):

Remember when we were young and we went to our friends house to play the Gamecube or Wii? It was the best way for guys and gals to join with their friends and do something super trendy in the 2000’s. Online multiplayer for games such as Call of Duty or Team Fortress 2 have made those plans with friends more and more less common but when friends you made in high school come back to visit the town you all grew up in, it’s not a bad idea to play a video game or even watch a movie all together. A timeless classic for old high school friends to watch as a reunion film is The Room.

5. Use artistic talents:

This is something not a lot of people do but it could be interpreted in a few ways:

1. You and someone else in your social group who have artistic talents, whether it be making music or drawing digital pictures, could try and make something together to publish to the internet.
2. You and someone you know could just set up a camera and do random things for YouTube, such as a skit or a music video.
3. You could run a blog with your friend and use whatever skills you have to collaboratively create something that could evolve into adulthood.

Essentially, if you and someone else have similar interests and want to do something fun using creation, than go for it.

Without Your Phone:

1. Engage in icebreakers and ask questions:

There are some people who absolutely hate icebreakers or small talk, for whatever reasons that it may be. Some examples of icebreakers are: “Where are you from?” “What do you like to do?” “When did you graduate college?” “Why did you choose journalism as a major?” Essential, have who, what, when, where, why and how questions. However, they are good ways of starting conversations hence why they are called ice breakers. Once you get the ball going with the icebreakers, keep asking questions about the person you are talking to that add more depth to their character.

2. Put it away, for the good of humanity:

Look at the world around you. Go for a walk around the neighborhood and talk about how nice or crummy the weather is.

But for real though: put your dang phone away when you’re talking with people. Unless someone is calling you, you should excuse yourself to answer the call. If it’s a text, briefly glance at it and skim it, and unless it’s urgent, reply to it later. People will see that if you’re on your phone doing other things instead being in the moment, people will not have interest in you. It will also give off the impression that you don’t have interest of what’s going on and you don’t care about what happens.

3. Actually have interest to what people are saying:

In all honesty, try and make an effort to listen to what people are saying. If there is a person you will probably only see once in your lifetime and you’re having a conversation with them, just pretend to have an interest in what they’re saying. If you fake having interest with someone who you wish to be friends with, that’s being a fake friend. Have interest in what people are saying by: being in groups or clubs with interests similar to yours, know and explore the people of who you wish to relate to, and gain knowledge from other people. For example: Hall High has an Anime club, if you like to watch Anime, join Anime club and meet some people that also like Anime. There are so many clubs at school and in the community, you just have to look.

4. Contribute to a conversation / humor:

If walking up to someone and saying “Hi my favorite color is green what’s yours” doesn’t work, then try listening to someone’s conversation and chime in. This could backfire because someone could think that you’re eavesdropping, but when it works, it’s amazing. Essentially, whenever an opportunity comes up to make a joke or pun, take it. This adds a little bit of flare to yourself; it makes you more recognizable and possibly more interesting, but keep it to a moderate degree. It will probably get old if you started to make jokes all the time with your friends.

5. Body language:

Body language is essential when it comes to communication. As with advice #2 for communicating without the cell phone, the way you present yourself physically can leave an impression on people. If you’re sitting up straight and paying attention to the conversation, then people might think you care about your current situation. If you’re lazily slumped in your chair, looking down, looking at your phone, then people won’t think you have interest in the conversation and will exclude you. The appearance you give off gives a lot of information to people to make judgement, even before they get to know you.

With mankind adapting, people could get better in the future and we’ll be able to solve our communication issues. Hopefully, this advice will help you improve your behavior and shape your social skills to be much more favorable.